Nothing has changed

I woke up this morning feeling the way I do most every other morning, alone, tired, hopeless, lost. I know I should not feel that way, but then again don’t I have a right to feel that way after everything I have been through. I know what everyone says, just think positive... well sometimes that is a lot easier said than done.
I just know I go to bed at night crying and feeling so alone and hopeless, wanting him to be here to hold me. Then I wake up and I feel resentment and hurt because he wasn’t.
Usually I try not to dwell on all the bad or negative in my life, but last night I went down the list of everything that was hurting me and bothering me, and it was very overwhelming. I guess that’s why people say don’t dwell on things too much. Like I said I am not trying to, but it is just consuming me. And the worst part is that most of it there is not a thing I can do to change it. And even things I can change I have been trying to for months, and it is not working. So I guess that is why I feel lost and desperate.
There are just too many things going on that I do not know what to do anymore. If it were just one or two things I could probably handle it a lot easier and at least try to come up with a plan. But the things that I have going on are just overwhelming and too much to try and tackle.

I have not posted much on here and it is just as well anyway. But if I do start posting more I will probably just try to stick with one thing at a time because otherwise it would turn into a book...

Well I have decided to go it alone on my photography business. I think I am making the right choice. I think it is too early to try and bring someone else into the mix. And I sure do not have the money to pay someone to help me at this point so I am better off alone.
I am hoping that with the right advertising and hopefully enough interested people I can really start getting some more business!!

Today was a good day I think... I talked to a friend who is helping me get my photography business up and off the ground. I had been starting to do that for awhile but sort of got burned out on it and really just lost hope in the idea that I could do anything with it. But then after talking to her and hearing how much she really believed in me, and after looking at someone's web site who I have heard of and seeing that her work is definitely sub par at best, I believe even more in myself now and that I really can do this. It may take some hard work and time, but anything worth having does...